Ottoman Sand
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Ottoman Sand
Cinnamon's Challenge: Villanelle (comments welcome. please let me know what you think?
Before Mohammad, city of Baghdad,
On the Tigris, kingdom of the Persians,
Before son Jesus, city of Baghdad,
Before your George Bush, city of Baghdad,
Flowing waters on a parched sand desert,
Before the Romans, city of Baghdad,
Before Sheik Omar, city of Baghdad,
In Islam’s Golden Age of Mathematics,
Before Buwayhids, city of Baghdad,
Before Timur the Lame, city of Baghdad,
Sacked again by the Turks and the Mongols
Before Ottoman, city of Baghdad,
Before the British, city of Baghdad,
War to end all wars, and then another,
Before bombs dropping, city of Baghdad,
Before death Saddam, city of Baghdad,
The factions have won, if the Army leaves,
Behold, rebuilding, city of Baghdad,
It was really inspiring and most appropriate in this time of propaganda and war where small-minded imbeciles invade a country just to take what they don't deserve!
-Now that I've gotten that off my chest....
I love how you used repitition of the phrase ''city of Bagdad" at the end of the 1st and 3rd lines in each stanza, it keeps one focused on what the real issue being discussed here is and the way you mention all the past countries who've invaded Bagdad shows just how rich its history is and the fact that after each invasion it has rebuilt itself makes me think of how life goes on despite whatever adversities!
And talk about ungrateful sods, if you all remember your history, it is in Bagdad with the rivers Tigris and Euphrates that agriculture and a settled way of life was first initiated -so that we have the early Iraqis to thank for our way of life now!!!
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Turkish Islamic art of Marbling (Ebru)
Do you like my poem Dad?
*****
Before Mohammad, city of Baghdad,
On the Tigris, kingdom of the Persians,
Before son Jesus, city of Baghdad,
Before your George Bush, city of Baghdad,
Flowing waters on a parched sand desert,
Before the Romans, city of Baghdad,
Before Sheik Omar, city of Baghdad,
In Islam’s Golden Age of Mathematics,
Before Buwayhids, city of Baghdad,
Before Timur the Lame, city of Baghdad,
Sacked again by the Turks and the Mongols
Before Ottoman, city of Baghdad,
Before the British, city of Baghdad,
War to end all wars, and then another,
Before bombs dropping, city of Baghdad,
Before death Saddam, city of Baghdad,
Stop the killing of women and children,
Before rebuilding, city of Baghdad,
*****
I've never shopped this one around. My Arab friends went nuts over it.
Oh my! The magnificence of this poem is stunning! Correct in your construction, correct in your repitition of the lines ending with Baghdad, correct in grounding it in history on many levels, and a knock-over last line ties the rest of this poem so well TOGETHER! Submit this for publication! Please! I meant your last two lines bring it all together!
Elysabeth Faslund...Poemhunter.com
